8 Things A Good Man Should Do/Be.

January 16, 2009

 

For a thousand times, I have heard of comments from rejected girls, those who suffered from poor relationships, and other sad stories, that good and nice men no longer exist in this world. After hearing these comments, I always cease my egotistical side that wants to defend man's race to avoid further misconception. I would not deny the fact that there exists bad and nasty men who ruin manhood since I know also many guys who are, still, naturally bad and nasty. But generally, I would beg to disagree with these girls since I know many guys who are naturally good and nice. One of them is Boaz.

"Boaz was a very wealthy man who lived in Bethlehem. When Naomi returned to Bethlehem with her widowed daughter-in-law, Ruth, Ruth went into the fields of Boaz to glean. Boaz learned that Ruth's deceased husband was a distant relative of his. 

He acted kindly towards Ruth and instructed his farm workers to leave extra sheaves of barley for her to gather. Ruth had another relative of her late husband who was closer than Boaz.
 

By law, the other relative was obligated to marry Ruth, as stated in Deuteronomy 25:5-10. Boaz confronted the other relative with this law, and after the relative refused to marry Ruth, Boaz agreed to marry Ruth, and to buy the estate of Ruth's deceased husband.
 

After they got married, Ruth had a son named Obed, who became the father of Jesse, who became the father of David. Boaz and Ruth became the great-grandparents of King David.
 

Boaz means "strength." The story of Boaz is found in the Book of Ruth."

Though Boaz is already a nonexistent in this world, men, in this generation, should be like Boaz. Beforehand, I was so focused on Ruth's character that I neglected the essence of Boaz' character. But God revealed to me more than what I asked for. I've outlined below the revelations that I received after reading the three chapters (not only for men but also for women):

1. Don't give false hopes, especially to women. Know your limitations. Protect the women.

 Ruth 3:12-13

"¹² Although it is true that I am a family guardian, there is another who is more closely related than I. ¹³ Stay here for the night, and in the morning if he wants to do his duty as your family guardian, good; let him redeem you. But if he is not willing, as surely as the LORD lives I will do it. Lie here until morning."

We give false hopes. We lie just to let the people around us feel okay. But when the moment comes that they claim our promises to them, we avoid them. Or, even if we can't provide the thing we've promised to the people around us, still we commit. This is a clear premise of giving of false hopes. Stories end up that those people become hurt. This is not a character of a good man.

When Boaz said the statement above, he was sure of everything. He was sure of his words. He did not say these things just to uplift the soul of Ruth, but because he was sure that he'd fulfill his words. He also knew his limitations. He was honest to Ruth that he couldn't accept Ruth immediately because of certain technical reasons. If you read the three chapters, you would notice that Boaz was really concerned with Ruth's welfare. He protected Ruth from hurt.

 

2. Don't be predator. Don't expect someone to stumble.

Ruth 2:15-16

"¹⁵ As she got up to glean, Boaz gave orders to his men, "Let her gather among the sheaves and don't reprimand her. ¹⁶ Even pull out some stalks for her from the bundles and leave them for her to pick up, and don't rebuke her."

When we know that a person is weak in a certain field, yet that person tries to overcome this weakness, we, on the other hand, expect that person to fail. Instead of encouraging that person or helping him or her, just like what Boaz did to Ruth, we are like predators, preying on someone. Instead of helping that person build his or her good character, we put snares on his or her path. A good man, logically, helps other people to be good.

3. Be patient.

Ruth 3:18

¹⁸ Then Naomi said, "Wait, my daughter, until you find out what happens. For the man will not rest until the matter is settled today."

Boaz patiently settled the affairs, though it would be strenuous and would take a long time. Most of us, instead of focusing on our objectives, i.e. help other people, we end up stopping and turning our backs after encountering difficulties. Impatience is not a character of a good man, for a food only becomes good after being heated on a long but proper time.

4. Be kind and helpful to everyone.

Ruth 2:14

¹⁴ At mealtime Boaz said to her, "Come over here. Have some bread and dip it in the wine vinegar." 

Boaz knew that Ruth was tired and already hungry. According to Mark Twain, “Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the and the blind can see”. Kindness is always heartfelt and knows no person, no boundary, and no fault. It should be given to everyone, whether to your enemy or to your friend. This the true kindness that a good man bears or does. Kindness is not even a response to what your physical eyes have seen, but what your heart wants to do.

5. Don't care about your reputation or social status. Be selfless.

Ruth 4:6

  ⁶ At this, the family guardian said, "Then I cannot redeem it because I might endanger my own estate. You redeem it yourself. I cannot do it."

Firefighters are selfless persons. We should be proud that there are still existing firefighters in the world, willing to risk their lives just to save someone. The family guardian above, on the other hand, is nothing but a selfish person. He was obsessed with his status that instead of helping his own relative, he felt that his status was endangered and thus neglecting the needs of his relative. Sometimes, we do the same thing that the family guardian did. We are like him. We are so afraid to lose something, we are so afraid to feel hurt, we are so afraid to be in shame, that we neglect the urgent needs of our loved ones or even the welfare of this nation. Wake up. If you consider yourself as good, then be selfless. If not, then go somewhere else and don't infect others.

6. Know God.

Ruth 3:13

"But if he is not willing, as surely as the LORD lives I will do it."

In this statement, it can be clearly perceived that Boaz knows God and that he considers God as his God. With God, you know that you need to move forward, be good in a situation, no matter how difficult it may seem. A good man, knows God, the root of goodness.

If you want to be good, then remove your sandal. Ruth 4:7 (Now in earlier times in Israel, for the redemption and transfer of property to become final, one party took off his sandal and gave it to the other. This was the method of legalizing transactions in Israel.). Let the old times of hurting other people, especially women be gone. See every woman as Ruth. Love them, take care of them, preserve them. To everyone, ladies and gentlemen, offer your life for a very good reason; seek eternity, seek Him.